The People Of St Olaf
- Rose was known as the Sherlock Holmes of St. Olaf.
- Ned - the town idiot.
- Neals Federlander - town jerk who worked at Lars Soda & Tackle Shop.
- Uncle Gunter
- Sonya Henderfeinkins - Rose's childhood friend.
- Lucky Gunther - had a tractor accident where his arm was replaced with forceps. Lucky delivered babies and served corn at the annual Rotary picnic.
- Helgie - Rose's friend
- Lenny Lenderflaut - Rose's schoolmate; sat behind him in class.
- Ingmar - Rose's cousin who did bird imitations.
- The Amazing Shapiro - was an Obstitrition Magician who delivered her daughter Bridget.
- Sigfried and Roy Feud - psychotherapists who co-wrote, "If I Have all the Cheese that I want, why am I still Unhappy?"
- Else Holdenfaulfer - Rose's friend.
- Nolan - Rose'd cross-eyed cousin from Ohio. Blanche & Dorothy slept with him.
- Little Yemeni - boy who was raised by a moose and was put through medical school.
- Hans Flegelfliester - citizen
- Ms Ciderson - school teacher and lip reader.
- Henrietta - Rose's prize cow.
- Mr. Hoffenhaizer - gentleman who inseminated Harry the cow.
- Adam - Rose's son who was conceived on The Day of the Princess Pig.
- Jenella - Rose's daughter who
was conceived on Hay Day
- Kearston - Rose's other daughter who was conceived on Wheat Day.
- Claire Ousterhausen - Claire's husband was stationed somewhere during WWII and she got pregnant while he was gone. Rose believes because of this, sperm must live outside of the body; it came over by mail, she claims.
- Adolph Stepp - St. Olaf's most eligible bachelor.
- Olga Fetching - St. Olaf's beautician and most unattractive woman.
- Vidal Sassboggendogger
- Mr. Snuffles - Rose's prize piglet.
And more great ones coming soon!!!